Mad Libs On Crack
by Humor Is NOT For Losers
Summary: A bunch of screwed up stories about TV shows, movies, books, video games, and more. And the best part is that I made all of them.
1. Goku VS Sarah Jessica Parker

Mad Libs On Crack By Humor Is NOT For Losers

**Author's Note: Yeah, I was bored when I made this. So what? Anyways, this story's main purpose is to… well, make bad fanfictions look like masterpieces. I made the story while my younger brother came up with the words (which are underlined). Enjoy!**

Mad Lib #1: Goku VS Sarah Jessica Parker

One Tuesday morning, in school, Goku was punching his desk. In fact, he was punching so much that Matthew Koma easily surprised him. "Hi Goku!" Matthew shouted. Goku jumped in surprise. "What the heck?! Can't you see I'm trying to hump a pizza?" Goku asked lovingly. "I do, but I don't care," Matthew said while hanging his horny mailman. "Anyways, I'm here to tell you that Sarah Jessica Parker just zoomed a dog." This got Goku's attention. He knew that Sarah Jessica Parker was a no good son of a biscuit. "Don't worry. I'll show her who's boss," Goku said before kicking to McDonald's.

Forty-seven hours later, Goku finally made it to McDonald's. However, the place looked a little different from before. Instead of condoms and Pikachus, all that was there were retards and long bathtubs. "Something about this place seems… different," Goku said while biting through McDonald's. Just then, a mean phone came out of nowhere and punched him in the left ear. "Not my left ear!" However, this phone didn't look like an ordinary phone. It looked like a mixture of a rabbit and Barbra Streisand. "Who are you, and where did you come from?" the beast asked Goku. Goku answered, "My name's Goku, and I'm from Earth!" Suddenly, the beast was saddened by the Saiyan. "Get out of here, or else I'll be forced to smell your right shoulder," the beast threatened. "Well that's not very nice," Goku said angrily. "I don't care if it's nice or not. Prepare to die!" the beast said like it was Tom Cruise. And just like that, Goku and the beast were becoming.

The beast managed to kick Goku in the rib cage. However, Goku managed to blast the beast with his chicken strip. "Is that the best you can do?" Goku asked. However, the beast was far from done. It grabbed it's smelly cheese and tasted Goku. This caught the Saiyan off guard. "You may have done damage to me, but I won't give up that easily. Watch as I blow you away with my drunk cat!" Goku shouted while charging up his Superman. The beast looked in horror as Goku charged his ultimate attack. "Kamehameha!" To say that the beast was in unbearable pain would be an understatement. The beast screamed, "Shit biscuit!" And just like that, the battle was over. "Ryan Gosling smells like Godzilla's balls," Goku said as a tomato was thrown at his face.

The End


	2. The Typical Modern-Day SpongeBob Episode

Mad Lib #2: The Typical Modern-Day SpongeBob Episode

Under the sea, a sponge named SpongeBob was banging. While he did that, Patrick walked up to SpongeBob's right butt cheek and annoyingly whispered, "Hey SpongeBob. You wanna scratch Squidward?" SpongeBob smiled at what his best pal told him. "Heck yeah!" SpongeBob shouted, scattering Patrick in the process.

Meanwhile, Squidward was jogging his wasted hobo when he saw SpongeBob and Patrick. "Oh crud!" he screamed as he mixed into his house. He locked every blowup doll, toy Elmo, and barf in his house. "That should keep them out." Unfortunately, they were able to break through the door by chasing it. "Nice one, Patrick," SpongeBob complimented as he got out his retarded Super Mario.

"Please don't hurt me," Squidward begged like a bloody penis. "Silly Squidward. Why would we do that?" SpongeBob asked, who of which sounded creepily similar to Kim Kardashian. "Yeah. We never do that to you. Well, on purpose at least," Patrick said, getting out his humping dog in the process.

Suddenly, a bunch of Subway employees came bursting through the already-damaged door. "Scratch your ass while singing American Pie!" one of the employees shouted with a sad Phoenix Wright in his possession. "Shit! It's the Subway employees!" Patrick yelled. "You'll never take us alive!" SpongeBob shouted as he started firing rusty cans at the employees. "That tears it," another one of the employees said as him and his teammates got ready to do battle.

The fight was pretty happy. From the start, it looked like that SpongeBob and Patrick were gonna win. However, after Patrick accidentally jumped on Barack Obama, the tide turned to the other side. Before finishing the two monsters off, the leading employee said, "I saw a person humping a cat." Finally, the war had come to an end.

"Thank you! You don't know how happy I am!" Squidward said. "It's nothing. After all, my brother is a gay man," the leading employee said before him and his teammates left Squidward's house.

The End


	3. For Once, Ash Ketchum Is Smart

Mad Lib #3: For Once, Ash Ketchum Is Smart

Once upon a time, there was a mentally-retarded, raven-haired, and forever 10-year old boy named Ash Ketchum (aka Ass Ketchup). He gave Pokemon handjobs for a living. He traveled alongside a slightly older redhead (physically and mentally) named Misty Waterflower and an African Asian Pokemon/child molester named Brock Flint. Oh, and how could we forget everyone's favorite character, Mario? Aren't we just a bunch of shitfaces?

Anyways, while the group was traveling through Johto, Barbra Streisand got in their way. "What's up, assholes!" Barbra greeted mockingly. "Aw man. Why does Barbra have to ruin everything?" Ash complained. "What do you want, Barbra?" Misty asked. "I want to zip your copy machine," Barbra explained to the so-called heroes. "Why?! Can't you zip on your own time?" Brock asked as he gently vanished his Vulpix. "I would, but I chose not to," Barbra said. "If I were you, I wouldn't hesitate on giving me your copy machine." Of course, being the humongous dimwit he is, Ash gave in to Barbra's demands. "Was that so hard?" And just like that, Barbra was gone faster than you can say, "Bob Barker's balls!"

"Ash! What the fuckburgers?!" Misty screamed louder than when she did at Kim Kardashian's house. "Do you realize what you just did?" Brock asked while he began to mix his Vulpix. However, the immortal youngster didn't respond to his friends' concerns. In fact, he was smiling like Dr. Doofenshmirtz. "What did you give Barbra?" Misty asked. "Nothing special," Ash said before getting out his Homer Simpson-shaped binoculars.

Meanwhile, Barbra was laughing like any bad guy in a Dreamworks movie would. "That freaking dweeb will do anything I tell him to," Barbra chuckled as she noticed the smell of palm trees. "What is that?" Then, before you knew it, Barbra was banged by used condoms. "That cock-sucking dick!"

Back with the gang, Ash put away his binoculars. "What was that?" Brock asked as he finished with giving Vulpix a blowjob. "Simple. I put a bunch of used condoms into that copy machine," Ash replied cockily. Misty and Brock gave Ash looks of fear and seduction. "Who knew that Ash got smarter?" Mario asked out of nowhere. Ash, Misty, and Brock then looked at Mario with shocked expressions. "Whoops. I guess Lady Gaga needs to die in a ditch."

The End


End file.
